Father's Day

     Today is Father's Day, which is a day that typically passes without my knowing.  My own father divorced my mother when I was two years old, and I only have a handful of memories of meeting him throughout my life.  My mother re-married when I was about 10 years old, but my step-father was pretty disinterested in me, and we never really did any father-daughter type stuff.  The last time I saw him was when I was 18; I had been kicked out of the house while still in high school and I ran into him at the grocery store.  He asked me how college was.  He died about eleven years ago, and I did not find out until last year.  That's how close we were, and how close my family is in general.

This is the only photo I have of my father.  I found it on Facebook.

This is the only photo I have of my deceased step-dad.

     Despite my poor, or basically non-existent relationships with the father-type figures in my life, I don't really feel upset or bitter about any of it.  In fact, I can't really identify any strong emotions that I have toward either of these men.  It's almost as though I read about them years ago in a magazine article that I vaguely recall, they are that far removed from any center of emotion or personal feeling for me.  So, I generally don't give Father's Day a second thought.  Until this year. 
     I got up early this morning and went for a 13 mile run with our dog.  While on the bike path, on our way to the trail, I overheard some people talking about Father's Day, and it occurred to my that our soon-to-be-born son may very well one day become a father.  That's pretty mind-blowing to think of, especially since he is still a fetus.  According to our baby development phone app, he is currently the length of an ear of corn and weighs about 1.5 pounds.  But that little baby is growing.  And he will continue to grow until one day, he may be bigger than me.  It is my every hope that we will raise our son to have a healthy perspective on family and relationships, to realize that he matters and that he can create happiness with others.  I want for him to grow up strong and healthy, and if he chooses to raise a family of his own, I want him to be a great dad who enjoys each Father's Day by spending it with his child(ren).  
     I don't even know what our son looks like yet, but as I ran, I tried to imagine him as an adult, an wondered what kind of a person he will be.  I followed the river, looked at birds that flew over head, and I felt such happiness knowing that one day, I will take our son on this trail first in a papoose, then in a stroller, then on foot or bike, and maybe, perhaps, one day, he will lead a child down that same trail on Father's Day, wearing a big smile.  
     

He's Kicking!

     I finally got to feel our little one kick, and I am so excited for that.  We were sitting at home yesterday evening before going to bed, and I was in a goofy mood so I started singing a song I remember from childhood, The Story About Sammy.  My wife rolled her eyes and said, "Oh no!"  Of course, I wanted to continue torturing her, so I said that even if she didn't want to hear me sing the song, the baby most certainly did!  I got my phone, and searched for the song online.  Once I found it, I placed the phone next to her belly and pushed play.
     "Oh, great, you woke him up!" she said.  "He likes it!" I said.  To add to the fun, I made some fart noises near her belly by blowing air onto my arm.  Well, like most little kids, apparently our little one thinks this is hilarious.  He started kicking.  He's kicked before, but this time he kicked hard enough for me to feel him.  I was so happy to finally get to feel him move.  I think we will have to have a lot more silly songs and fart sounds very soon!

Fast Fetus!

I am so excited for our little one to be born this October.  And though he is still a tiny fetus, I am already proud of him.  

This past Saturday, my wife ran the Evaro Mountain Challenge 5K while 5 months pregnant.  That alone is an astounding feat in my opinion.  But, to top it off, she placed 2nd!  I think our little one will be fast!

We are very committed to doing the best that we can to teach our son that good health is important.  We will do everything that we can to encourage the development of good mental health, active physical health, and positive eating habits that we hope will give him a lifetime of happiness.  I can hardly wait to see who he will become!

Mother's Day

     This past Sunday was Mother's Day.  This year, that day had a new meaning for my wife and I as our little one continues to grow and get ready for his/her big debut.  I spent the sunny morning running in the mountains where the season's wildflowers are in full bloom, and when I came home, my wife and I ate whole wheat chocolate chip waffles with walnuts and bananas.  I love making waffles.  I gave my wife some comfy, summery maternity pajamas, and she surprised me with a bouquet of very colorful flowers on the kitchen table.
     The day after Mother's Day was our second and final ultrasound.  This is the one when they do the anatomy scan.  We got to see the baby rolling and kicking around, and we got to see the baby's internal organs and external body parts.  I was really impressed with his/her strong, active legs and lively feet.  My wife loved seeing the four chambers of the baby's heart beating and pumping.
     Seeing the baby move and hearing his/her heartbeat made me feel closer to the baby.  We also learned the baby's gender, and so now we know the baby's name.  We are keeping these as a surprise for others, but I love being able to call our little one by his/her name when I talk to him/her through the filter of my wife's blossoming belly.
     The next time we will get to see our baby will be for his/her birthday in October.  That seems like a long way off now, but if the next 4.5 months are anything like the first, they will go by quickly.

Heartbeats

Today, at my wife's prenatal doctor visit, we heard our baby's heartbeat for the very first time.  It was about 160 beats per minute.  Today was also the day of the Boston Marathon, and there were 2 bombs that exploded at the finish line, stopping several heartbeats, and probably increasing the heart rates of the runners who already had elevated heart rates due to the miles that they had just run.

My wife and I are both runners.  We've each done two half marathons, and several shorter races.  In fact, one of the first purchases we made for our yet-to-be-born baby was a jogging stroller so that we can take him or her out with us for runs when he or she is old enough.  We are hoping to share our love for the outdoors and physical exercise with our child whose heartbeat we heard today.  Neither my wife nor I are elite runners; women in our age group qualify to participate in Boston if they can run 26.2 miles in 3 hours and 35 minutes or less.  We are not part of the Boston community, and yet as runners, we are a part of that community.  It may sound strange to those who don't run, but runners share a common bond over the miles we run, the challenges we choose to take on, and the dedication we put into such an individual sport.  And because of this, I feel a connection to those runners and race spectators in Boston today.

It is a very strange juxtaposition to hear our child's heartbeat for the first time on a day when some of the best members of our running community were threatened and injured by bombings.  I am overjoyed and deeply disturbed at the same time.  It makes me worry about the kind of world our little one will grow up in. I know that bad things have happened all throughout history, and that this really is nothing new.  It just feels a lot more personal this time.

That's Not Soup!

Today, I cooked for several hours and I have no food to show for it.

I do, however, have a large stack of prefold diapers that are ready to go!  Prefold diapers are plain, cloth diapers, and when they are new, they are not very soft or absorbent.  So, you have to wash them 5-6 times in hot water.  Or, you can boil them, which is what I chose to do.  Boiling seemed like a better idea than multiple washes because it uses less water and less energy.

This is what a stack of 10, new, cotton diapers looks like right out of the package.  They are mostly flat, not so soft, and really too large to put on a baby.  We have a total of 60 diapers in both newborn size and regular size.  I don't know what a "regular" size baby is, but apparently that size applies to any baby that is no longer a newborn.  Regular is also a funny word to use when talking about diapers, but only because it makes me think of people on laxative commercials since I have a juvenile sense of humor.

I generally only get out the huge canning pot in late summer/early autumn when we are taking in tomatoes, beans, and other produce from the backyard by the basket full.  But today, it came in handy to boil about 10 diapers at a time.  I filled the canner with water, and set it boiling.  Once it was going pretty good, I added the diapers and boiled each batch for 30 minutes.  All in all, I boiled diapers on the stove for about 4 hours today.  Our dog, Bonny, sat diligently in front of the stove hoping I might give her a taste of what was cooking.  We kept telling her, "that's not soup!"  But, she didn't believe us.  In her mind, there was no way someone would spend that much time in front of the stove on a day off of work if they weren't cooking up something delicious.  We ate leftover pasta from the night before as the diapers continued to boil.  And boil.  And boil.



When the diapers were done cooking, I moved them to the washing machine to wash once in hot water and then tumble dry.  After the entire process was through, the diapers were much softer and fluffier than before. They had also shrunk down to the appropriate size, and they grew in thickness.  Here are the same 10 diapers pictured above, now having been boiled and washed.

Diapers are pretty expensive, cloth included.  I've read that the average baby goes through about 2,200 diapers per year, and that it's parents spend $1,500-$2,000 on diapers each year.  And that's just diapers, not wipes or anything else!  We spent $130 on enough cloth diapers to get our baby from birth through potty training thanks to a lady we met on Craig's List who had a great supply of cloth diapers that she had never used.  We think that cloth diapers are a great idea due to the money we will save, the comfort factor for our baby, and the lower impact on our environment.

Next up . . . dying the diapers in all the colors of the rainbow!

Marriage Equality

     After being with my wife for over 11 years, and after all that we've been through together, it's incredibly indignant to have our relationship status questioned at a national level. However, it is very heartening to see so many of our friends and family speak out in support of our relationship, and others' relationships. I am hoping that the Supreme Court will make the right decision regarding the two cases before it this week. But even if it doesn't, that will not change the strength and endurance of our relationship together, nor will it threaten the love that we share together and that we share with all who are on our side, and the side of so many other couples who just want to live happily.

          I very much hope that our child will be born to two parents who are legally married, and who can therefore offer him or her the full benefits and protections of our nation in addition to the love that we will certainly give to him or her.